There was no lump -- a Breast Cancer blog

This blog is about my experience with Inflammatory Breast Cancer.
You can learn more about Inflammatory Breast Cancer at or

The names of my Doctors have been changed.



Contact me at Liane58 at gmail dot com
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Location: United States

Saturday, October 23, 2004

Getting acquainted with my new body

As I said before, I’m relieved to have my surgery over with. And my feelings about my “new and improved” body are curiosity, interest, even wonder. New sensations, of my chest area itself (some numbness, some tenderness), and also of my hand as I run it over the new shapes – the very flat shapes (although I still have the drains in and I can feel one of the tubes running to the incision). In fact, rather than flat, it seems concave, flatter than flat, not just that the breast has been removed but even dug out!
And what do I call this, the space on my chest where my right breast was? The scar, the incision, the place of my mastectomy – but the skin is still there (not all of it, but the skin that is there has been carefully preserved, and the incision is very neat.). The nipple is gone, the shape is gone – the ducts and glands and lobes and tubes that were always there although I never thought about them much. How do I name what is left, the skin, the scar, the little bit of muscle over bones? Maybe there’s a word I don’t know yet, until then it seems like it’s the proverbial “presence of an absence” of literary theory.